What with being trapped in the house overnight, I had to find something extra weird to bring you. Below, this is a neighborhood for the ages. The kid’s aren’t alright, but they are fine by me.
In my Beyond the Valley of the Doll searching, I came upon a clip that is fucking nuts. That lesbian bitch, Roxanne from BTVOTD is back, in a movie called Vixen which from what I can tell is about fish dancing. I remember the first time I seduced by a woman dancing with a fish. Pure sex.
I just heard this song on the radio on the ride to work this morning and I dig it. Jigsaw is a pretty shitty band name and the song itself is pure cheese, but fuck that, listen to the falsetto. Please also to look at the wiener singer in this amazing video. Let me tell you, that plane landing was NOT stock footage. Also, those people are actually that pink. That is NOT because of shitty filming. Finally, please to check out the couple at 1:50. I want to be that couple. Dazed look, yellow turtleneck. That is what clubbing is all about.
The last and only time (thus far) I was in Paris (I’m going back in March, woot), which was in 11th grade, I became obsessed with a song I heard on MTV Europe. Said song is entitled Narcotic by the band Liquido. The song is a friendly tale about cocaine and the video takes place in the courtyard of some extra slutty apartment complex. Freaky Germans of various persuasions do a whole buncha flirting. No one is all that hot and everyone is mostly douchey. Also, singer has a big ol’ unibrow which makes me so hot.
Storytime. After Paris, we went to Amsterdam. In the Red Light District, I saw the video playing in a television store so I went in to watch. An older gentleman followed me into said shop and proceeded to try to talk with me for a bit to which I mostly ignored because I have a tendency to ignore people. My parents, getting worried because I had been in there too long, rushed into the shop right as the man went in for a crotch grab. My mother gave him a good smack and we were on our way.
Listen to my near molestation song. It’s not quite as great as I remember, but I still enjoy it.
Trip planning and puppy watching has taken a toll on my blogging ability, but now, I’m back and about to be stuck in that big snow situation. Start!
Better of Ted has somehow managed to make me like that cunty lame blonde, Linda. How did it do that? By making Portia take her under her crazy crazy wing. In the clip below, Linda delivers a very weird smack down to a hottish older man. You’re the one who smells like rotting meat.
Beyond the Valley of the Dolls is one of the best movies of all time. And by that I mean its fucking awful, but awfully perfect. The following scene will show you what a freaky mess the movie is and why I love it so. A little background, Ashley St. Ives is one of the best movie characters if all time. All she has to do is make her crazy eyes and mouth thing happen and squeal some sort of dog sound and you fall in love. Just like poor Harris. He has such a sad face all of the time. I had a serious crush on him back in high school. Other things, I wish I had unnecessary walking around music.
If ever there was a teen death song, this and Last Kiss would be at the top. “Patches” by Dickey Lee has all of the good stuff. A Romeo and Juliette love affair, rich and poor folks and good old fashion suicide by drowning. Poor Patches. Don’t worry. You’ll have company soon enough, so says the end of the song. Happy listening.
Check out the picture at 2:07. Nothing like putting your relatives’ pictures up in a video about suicidal teens.
WHAT THE FUCK IS DONALD DOING? Back in the 40s, things went silly for cartoons. They got all political and shit and then Donald became a Nazi. The song played at the beginning is really specially and by that I mean, “Wow, how acceptable in this day and age”. Even the rooster does the Nazi salute. Sweet Jesus. It can’t be a Donald cartoon without him losing his damn mind, and at 6:15, this one is no different.
Also, when you sleep, versions of yourself slip into your ass. This is proof.
Same damn good song, even awesomer (not a real world) version. Marina pulls out some strange Eastern European grained up video where she sings over an orchestra. I love me some orchestra in a pop setting, less so in a classical setting. We also get a bit of Polish accent with subtitles scrolling along. Tall is tall in Poland. Why don’t they have a word for someone with extra height? I understand tan, they’re Polish, what’s tan over there?